Do you just know that you just have the power to make a person go crazy over you?
And that you have the ability to make everything more complicated by those simple things that you do?
I can't say if my interpretations are right. I don't really know what your true intentions are. But with the signs you're sending, I can't tell if you just want me to pursue and see how far I could go or if it's just a sort of revenge, doing things that you know can make me be more into you...make me long for you.
During the week that followed that last day...the day which I passed by through smiles but deep inside a crying heart, I've tried really hard to keep myself busy, not really able to regain the strength I need even just a 7-hour sleep. But then I still find time to think of you, to recall the memories I've had when you held on to my gaze. And I still find time amidst all the things I do to feel this intense longing for you...the feeling of missing you.
But the week after that week(which seemed to me a year), I have actually started to take a few big leaps to the path that leads where you are not. Oh sure, gotta admit that I still think of you each night before going to bed. I still wake up with the memory of your face in my head. But then it wasn't like before when I could just lay down all day thinking of you(oh yeah...actually US--that which can never be) And I know I really have to move on because as soon as 3rd term sets in, I have to get serious, and I must not see you anymore becauase I believe it could only ruin my (future)career, my personality, my life...and YOURS too. And to ruin your everything hurts me more than anything else.
And so after reading this quote
How do I say goodbye to someone I never had?
Why do tears fall for someone who was never mine?
Why is it that I miss someone I was never with?
Why do I love someone whose love can never be mine...
and after watching My Sassy Girl once again and Corpse Bride(would you believe an animated film can teach us something about love?) saying that loving a person truly may mean letting go of that person if that's what can make that person happy
...and after much much careful thought, I knew I had to let go. Oh no, let me correct that...I had to give up. Letting go and giving up are two different things as one quote said, and the latter suits our case 'coz
I never had you
You were never mine
I was never with You
And I do really know that your love can NEVER EVER really be mine
I may never know the answers to the posted quote but then I know I had to give up.
So what about the signals? I was misinterpreting them alright. So again, for the nth time sorry!
But then do I hate you for all these?
Should I hate our fate for making us share one class?
Must I grumble to God or to cupid for love's sake on why did I have to know you?
Nah...I guess not. For as I've said, 'you brought me to place i may never have been'
It was just 2 weeks ago or less I guess...when I said goodbye. But indeed how could I say that word when I never really had you anyway. So now I'm taking it back.
Instead I wanna say thanks!
Yeah, THANKS for
even though we have not shared moments together, you inspired me to live on with the simple smile I see on your face;
even though we haven't talked to each other you brightened my world with your laughter and your sweet voice;
and even though I haven't really felt what it's like to be in your arms, just to feel your presence so near me is enough.
And even if you don't want to forgive me and I know you may never will, I believe you have spent enough time for me...enough time for my craziness...so thanks!
A new year has started... Will there be a new life for me? I just hope so...
A new life for you? I believe so.
For after this term, you'd swerve your way to a different path,
a path which I'll pray you'll succeed in,
a path which I know might pose as a challenge,
but also the path that I know will be for your best.
But while we're still traveling in the same path, would I wish to see you somehow?
I dunno...the One Up There knows best...
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