20 and still S!ngLe

Most of the people in my friendster list are either in a relationship or married.
Childhood friends that are way younger than I am are so in love and unavailable anymore.
But here I am...20 and still cold, alone, single....and yet happy.

Yet people keep on asking why...


Because...

AFRAID OF COMMITMENTS
Yup. That's one of my fears and it will probably take a long long long time before I can get over such fear.

SUBCONSCIOUS STILL IN SEARCH OF AN IDEAL
If you asked me what my ideal man is, I wouldn't answer you. That's because I belive that ideals only exist in dreams. In addition to that, ayaw ko magsalita nang tapos kasi alam ko balang araw kakainin ko mga salita ko. But if one could just look at my subconscious, I know I have the perfect man inside....the man who doesn't exist.

DON'T WANT TO FAIL THE PEOPLE AROUND ME---family and friends
Someone once told me "Bakit yung mga maganda at matalinong babae napupunta lang dun sa mga bobong lalaki?"
I'm not trying to fit in myself to her description of the lady but I know that my friends and family have better plans for me than falling for a tricycle driver or that guy..
the guy which this same person referred to when she told me "Alam mo ba yung mga grades mga line of 7-"
"Alam mo huwag kang papatol dun...mukhang zombie" referred by my other friend
So here I am, trying to search for the man whom my heart will fall for and yet my friends and family will also accept.

FREEDOM
Ever since I was a small kid, I hated the word "HUWAG", I ctry just to hear that word. That only signifies how much I love my freedom and I don't want any guy telling me not to wear this because it's too daring or not to go there because I'm the only rose among the tthorns in that party...

THE CHALLENGE
It goes something like
I-like-you-but-you-don't-like-me-so-we-remained-friends-but-then later-on-you-turned-to-like-me-but-now-I-only-see-you-as-a-friend-and-I-don't-like-you-anymore

STUBBORN HEART
What I want is what I want, no one can change that

"WAIT;DON'T PURSUE" PHILOSOPHY
No...not because I still believe boys must do the ligaw thing...but because of my greatest sin which is pride. I can't take rejection my dear.

I'M STILL YOUNG
There's still to much to explore and I want to do it on my own

INDEPENDENCE
I want to live alone
I want to drive on my own
I want to go through processes without relying on anyone
I remember my intphil prof saying di siya makakatagal na may kasama sa bahay.....well, I can relate

SINGLE BUT NOT AVAILABLE STATUS
This is actually in relation to my stubborn heart.
Though I remain uncommitted, most of the time a name has been imprinted in my heart.

MASOCHIST LOVER
No! It's not about the slap-me-before-we-do-that-thing. It's about me loving the people who can't love me back...

COMFORT & EXCITEMENT
I need both. Problem is it's hard to balance the two. With an acquaintance, I can get too jumpy it's hard to move and I'm so conscious about myself. But with a well-known friend, I get too comfy that I don't see him as a life-time partner anymore...It's as if we've gone too far that the sparks were lost.

But I know I can find the one. I've once found it but then PRIDE came in and...it's a long story



I'M AN ACCOUNTANT AND ACCOUNTANTS REMAIN SINGLE
(just for fun...or is it for real???)

They balance the debits and the credits
They make sure that for anything that comes out something comes in. For everything I give away, something must be given to me. If we can't have at that, then byebye

We're also auditors
We audit everything about their potential partner
They check whether every word he say is true

Cost-Benefit Analysis
Is he/she worth the ivestment?
Being known as BOXERS(ultra-kuripot people), we want someone who is low-maintenance or someone where the returns are great. Return must always be more than the risks.

History Matters
Accounting is about the past and we can't help but compare to know if we have done a good choice this time...

We Don't Rush into Things
as OCs, everything must be carefully panned
Give us some time and we may think about it.

We can't work on Assumptions
There must be facts to work with...you have to tell us directly
We can't just assume...espeacially for women

Marketing People hate Accountants
...what more do i have to say? ü